Hurt People, Hurt People. Loved People, Love People. (HPHP/LPLP - Part 5)

So I haven't blogged in what seems like forever. And the last time I did blog, I was on this "community" kick and had a series of 5 blogs that revolved around what community is supposed to be. I am still on that kick and still intend to write those blogs, so soon I hope.

With that said I had to make time to write this one.

I was listening to a song by Manafest called "Wanna Know You" and there is a line in the second verse that really got me. It says, "Loved people, love people. Hurt people, hurt people." I recently read a book (for one of my counseling classes) by Dr. Sandra Wilson called, "Hurt People, Hurt People." It was about understanding why people that have been hurt continue to hurt others.

With that and for the last six months God has been really working on me about what it means to love people and ultimately Him. So that line in the song really struck me as something that is important for everyone that claims to follow Christ to understand.

Hurt People, Hurt People

I'm not actually gonna say anything about why or how hurt people, hurt people. I am, however, gonna direct this toward those that have accepted Christ's love (the secret is - and it's actually not a secret - Christ loves us all, all the time...we just need to accept it).

I get SO tired of hearing how Christ's people are "done" with someone because they hurt them while they were "trying to love them." News flash...people that are hurt are not there to love you, it's the other way around.

Here's the thing, in going in to love someone that is hurting, you have to expect some resistance. You have to expect them to be somewhat leery of your intentions, because they were just hurt. People that are hurt or hurting are that way because someone they cared for either left them (whether it be intentionally i.e. divorce/break-up or unintentionally i.e. death), betrayed them or broke their trust some how. So you have to understand that they may not be so readily accepting of what you want to give them.

We are called to love people, to comfort the hurting and even pray for those that persecute us. If you are the recipient of Christ's amazing love, you have a responsibility to give it away to others and you have to understand that in trying to love them, you may get hurt. My friend, Grant Clark, has a saying that goes, "Where there's people, there's poop." The idea being that caring for people can get messy and if you are actually engaged in their lives, you WILL get messy.

On the other side of that coin...

Loved People, Love People

If you are a person that has surrendered your life to God and seeks to follow Christ, this is you. If you are actively engaged in a relationship with Christ, in which He is pouring out His love on you, you will love people. In John 15:12 Jesus says, "My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you." Jesus was telling us that the way He loved us was an example of how He expected us to love each other. If you are truly the recipient of Christ's love, you WILL love others.

The Bible is very clear on this point. 1 John 4:20-21 says:

If someone says, “I love God,” but hates a Christian brother or sister, that person is a liar; for if we don’t love people we can see, how can we love God, whom we cannot see? And he has given us this command: Those who love God must also love their Christian brothers and sisters.

So, loved people, love people.

I'll close with this...How badly did we hurt Christ (and still do at times) while He was trying to love us? What if He would have given up on us because He got hurt?

I Will Love Regardless,

Bruce

commUNITY: Love

Lately God has really challenged me to look at how I love Him, specifically what the outpouring of that love looks like. Through that I found myself kind of lost on how I actually show God my love. God's question was completely rhetorical and He eventually showed me that we are to show our love for Him by pouring it out on His people. Essentially, if we love God, we'll love the ones He loves (basically that's everyone else). He clarified through a number of ways (my devotional time, my youngest son) and I was able to flesh that out in a few previous posts. (My Son the Teacher & You Feed Them)

After clarifying the loving Him part, God started moving me toward what it means to love well and what forum is required for real, genuine love to exist. At theSHIFT we have a set of core values that revolve around four "Cs". They are Connection, Community, Challenge and Christ (my friend Thomas [BLOG love] has a great article on this if he'd ever post it). With that said I knew that community was important, but God began to show me just how important it is to this love relationship is. The idea is that when you connect people to each other and Christ, they begin to develop community with each other and Christ. Within community is where love, fellowship, accountability, worship, sacrifice and service to others occur. When that happens, Christ begins to challenge you to a place where you want to connect more people with Him. Then the cycle continues.

So, this post is meant to talk about community (there will probably be a few of them). I think the first thing that is important to get about community is that it's not just a place to hang out. Gospel community is a place where people that love each other, live openly with each other. They are honest and transparent within their community. They care about decisions others make and offer wise council and accountability. They gently, lovingly and firmly call each other out when one is engaged in sinful behavior. They worship, pray and fellowship together. They provide for each other generously and without grumbling. They don't backbite or seek to hurt others.

The key to community is love. Love is the foundation for everything. Christ identified two commandments in Luke 10:27, "You must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind. And, Love your neighbor as yourself." Jesus reiterated the need for love within community in John 13:34-35, which reads, "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." If you want to really know what community is supposed to look like, read 1 Corinthians 13:1-8, that's love and that's community. The New Testament is filled with places that the Apostles tell various churches what it means to live in community with each other and all of them say to love each other. In Galatians 5:14-15 Paul says, “The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself." If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.” In 1 Peter 3:8 Peter says, “Finally, all of you should be of one mind. Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted, and keep a humble attitude.” And in 1 John 2:10, John says, “Anyone who loves another brother or sister is living in the light and does not cause others to stumble.”

The point is this: Love is what community is built on. If anyone says they are a part of a community and does not display the action of love, they are a liar and are only there to under mind what Christ is building. Once community is developed and love flows outward from it, everything else comes naturally; accountability, servant-hood, fellowship, worship, and sacrifice.

The last thing I'll say about love within community is this:  the love within community should also draw and invite others in. The lost, unloved, unloveable and hurting should be attracted to community as a place where they will be accepted and loved. If people from the outside see your “community” and see jealousy, back-biting, gossip, selfishness, distrust and bitterness, they're gone. They won't come near you. That isn't community, that's the same thing that others, in the world, are trying to escape from. People should be able to find refuge, not refuse, in Christ's church.

My Son the Teacher

This kind of goes along my post from the other day, You Feed Them, but it's been the thing that God has been trying to get across to me.

A few day ago my youngest son, Andrew, told me about a kid in his class that is so desperate for friends that he brought $100 in $20 bills and began handing them out to other kids to be his friend.  I asked my son if he took it, he said no and that all the money was retrieved, the Dad was called and given the money.  But I asked Andrew why couldn't he just be the kids friend and he said, "Well, I tried but all he does is walk around the playground.  He won't play anything."  So I said, "Maybe you could just walk with him.  Then once he sees you're willing to just do that and really be his friend, then maybe he'll play." Andrew replied, "Yeah, I don't have to play all the time.  I could just walk with him."

The thing is, that's all people want.  They want you to walk with them.  As The Church it isn't our job to wait for people to come to us, nor is it our job to drag people to where we want them or think they should be.  People want us to walk with them and we have to be willing to go to where they are and just be with them.  Once they see that our agenda involves no other item then to love them, then they will trust that we actually love and care about them.  We are called to bring Christ and be Christ to them.  Jesus told us to seek out the lost sheep and bring them home, but he wasn't saying to just make sure they made it through the church doors.  He also told us to care for and feed His sheep and that must be done where they're at.  If people don't recognize His voice, they won't follow Him. It's our job to introduce Him to them, where they are at, so they begin to recognize and find comfort in His voice.  Then, and only then, will they follow us to the foot of His throne.  If we know the way, we HAVE to share it with others and that can only be done through loving them to Christ.  As Christ walks with us, so we should walk with them.  They just want you to walk with them.  Will you?